Damn, it's Monday again!

Well, let me catch you up to the events of this weekend. Friday night, I stayed home and watched all my DVR shows (not sure how I lived without DVR in the past). Anyway, I really didn’t feel that different and no new, or old for that matter, symptoms presented themselves. I guess the only constant variable in this whole mess are the cramps (side, lower abdomen, lower back, basically everywhere). Sat. ran a bunch of errands, tried to stay busy. Completed half of my beauty regime which felt nice (I almost feel human again!) Christian and I went to dinner and spent a nice night together. That night I had this weird dream. You see most newly pregnant women report having dreamt that they were pregnant, saw there unborn child, saw a pregnancy test that read positive, etc, but me, oh no, none of the above. What I say was me starting the unwanted never ending period/menstrual cycle/menses/aunt flow (only a fertility patient would know that many ways to describe an isolated event)! DAMN! What does this mean?
Is this god preparing me for the up coming negative news? Basically, that is exactly what I took it for. Why else would I dream such a terrible thing? Anyway, needless to say, Sunday sucked. All I kept thinking was that this month is going to prove yet another let down. I thought and over thought that dream and anything and everything that I was feeling. Anyways, as of today I have only 6 days left and we will know the truth. Although I know I can test before, starting tomorrow actually, I will not. Some of my friends that know I am going through this don’t believe that I will be able to hold out. Trust me though, I will not and I seriously mean it, will not test until the Dr. calls me with the news. Why would I do that to myself again? No way! No thank you!
Anyway, so this morning I went in for my progesterone testing. The dreaded progesterone. Can a person really hate a hormone so much? I hate progesterone! Anyway, I trust Dr. Werlin and if he says that progesterone supplements are necessary, then I have no choice. Should I get out my fat wardrobe? (Come on everyone has them?) I, unfortunately, have a skinny (my favorite), my “normal” (skinny only lasted a few months, but I do love to stare at that closet), and my “fat” (I want to burn the clothes that fall in this category)…but that is another story for another day.
I am expecting Dr. Werlin’s call in about 2-4 hours. So only time will tell. As one of my not so favorite Hill’s cast members would say, “truth and time”